Every December, Heidi and I talk and pray about a “Family Word for the Year” for the coming year. It’s a word that we write up on our white board in the kitchen for the boys to see, and we talk about often – so this ends up being a word that we both feel is necessary to focus on for that particular season in our family’s life. With four boys under the age of 12, we go to this word often!

One year, we noticed that our boys seemed to be struggling with honoring others with their words and actions – so our word for that next year was “honor.” It brought many teachable moments in coaching them in how they can show honor to those in authority, honoring a lady by opening the door for her, honoring each other in how each of us responds to conflict. You get the idea.

Last year, our word was “generosity.” I loved seeing the boys wrestle with the tension between collecting stuff they really want vs. being generous to others with the resources they are entrusted with. (And obviously, this is a word has been very helpful for Heidi and I to wrestle with, as well!)

“Serve”
In December, our conversations seemed to be focusing on our natural tendency to be “me-focused” and selfish. It became apparent to Heidi and I that our word for 2015 should be focused on others – so our word became “serve.” How can we be better servants, and focus less on ourselves?

Jesus
Obviously, the best example of a servant is Jesus. Mark 10:45 tells us that Jesus “came not be served, but to serve – and give His life as a ransom for many.” The big idea here is that he didn’t have to come and serve – but he chose to. Caesar Kalinowski, in his book Transformed, says that it was “out of love for his Father and a desire to restore us to a right and loving relationship with Him” that “He served us in a way that He alone could.” (p. 81) He served us by dying for us – and redeeming us from our sin. He is our example of living an others-focused life.

I’m always blown away by the example He gave us in John 13:1-11 when the Creator of the universe picked up a towel and walked around with a basin of water and washed His disciples’ feet. Even the feet of His soon-to-be betrayer!

We GET To
Our attitude should be the same as His. Not that we have to or should serve others – but that we get to serve others! This is part of our identity as disciples of Jesus.

Heidi and I have talked a lot recently with our boys about what it looks like to live as a family of servants in our home and in our neighborhood. How does this change how we live? What does it look like to “wash others’ feet?” How do we respond to things that bother us? What do we do when we see that something is broken or a mess? 

The thing that I love about coming up with a “family word for the year” is that it isn’t just for our four boys. It’s for ALL of us. We’re all learning and growing in what it means to serve. Transformed by – and in light of – the gospel. Very convicting – because I am by nature a very self-focused person.

I don’t know all that 2015 will hold for us – but I’m excited thinking about “serve” becoming more of the norm than the exception in our family and in our neighborhood.

How might God be calling each of us to serve, with the attitude of Christ, in 2015? 

Brian Petak
Pastor of Outreach and Missional Living

Brian can be reached at  or 615-277-9590.